“Couples counseling” isn’t a four letter word. Knowing when to get help is important and something that every couple needs be aware of. Here are a few signs that you might need help.
- Failed attempts to fix your marriage – many couples have/will have an experience where they need help in their marriage. They try and try and nothing gets better. They talk with friends, family and read books. They listen to online video’s from experts, but just can’t seem to get it right.
- Significant stress in your relationship during transitional periods – couples often experience stress during transitions. Children being born, children moving out, retirement, loss of a job – or getting new job, a change in health, a move to a new city, etc… These all bring stress (even positive stress is still stressful!).
- 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse – Researcher John Gottman found that if you have any of the following in your relationship, that it could be in trouble: Defensiveness, Criticism, Contempt or Stonewalling. See his book, Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.
A competent couples counselor will help you work through any of these types of issues. Couples come in to therapy years after it would be good to start. Don’t wait until its too late – most couples do.